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Well well well, how the Illamanati turn the tables

Discussion in 'Articles' started by ImN0tEvenG00d, Sep 6, 2023.

  1. ImN0tEvenG00d

    ImN0tEvenG00d New Member

    Apr 20, 2021
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    We are back at it again with the last series of the regular season for two of the most untalented teams known to 239. We have The Illamanati vs How The Turn Tables. Goodie vs Hall of Lavé. The newest council member will have his first series after being accepted into the 239 Council.
    Congrats to HOF, but you know daddy is gonna have to ruin that parade and absolutely demolish your team.

    Does this seem like a 239 councilman to you? Ignoring a fellow 239 member in need?? The answer to that is yes.

    Since draft day, I have messaged Hall of Fame “is mash is available” for a trade. I was gonna sell the team. Gayla? Who needs that piece of trash. StRAWBerry?? Blueberries are where it’s at. SpinOzzy? Makes me dizzy. Scoresxx? Anyone can flick up. Call me NoSaves? Trash cans are sometimes better. BarrettZeroGamesPlayedCal? Send me another bench guy.

    They were all for sale. I was stopping at nothing to get mash. But Lavé had other plans and decided to make trades with every other team other than mine. So fuck that French clown. He’s washed. He’s lost his thumbs. He’s an average 239 Dman. Yeah he still has 0 ping but walking down the boards and forcing cross crease every. Single. Time. Gets predictable and boring after the 16394729th time, but I digress.


    Anyway, game one doesn't start even remotely close to on time since Hall of Lavé club is glitched and can’t ready up into a game. So I joined their party to try and search a public match.

    Here I am minding my own business and all of a sudden I’m getting chirped by JSandbag and Erik Kelcherson for no reason. I’m just trying to start the game but these bozos have to talk shit and kick me once we start searching.

    I saw red after that. Time to fuck their night up and destroy them. NOBODY PUTS BABY IN THE CORNER!!!


    Game one was a massacre. They suck. We are better. We win. They lose. Four hundred and two to seven.
    Game 2 was another massacre. They still suck. We are still better. We still won. They still lost. A bakers dozen to one.

    Game 3 they fought back. We didn’t care. They suck again. We are better again. We won again. They lost again. Eleventy six to nothing.

    Series recap:
    - You think JMap would think that after the 50th time he crossed the blue line and went to the middle and got demolished he might wanna try and not do that.
    I would never tea bag after every hit I had against him in a league game.

    - Erik Kelcherson definitely learned to never kick me from a party during the god damn eashl playoffs when we don’t even know we matchup against each other because he got Illamanati nuts all over him all series getting coned and doing his best HOF impression of walking down the boards and turning it over.

    - HOF, next time trade me Mash. K thanks
    - Mash, sorry you gotta deal with these inbreds on your 239 team. I love chel.
    -Turtle and Goat, you guys will not be chirped k thanks.

    As for my team:

    P.S. Lemanski, I’m lookin at you buddy. I’m picking you first round if you don’t jump over us. And if you don’t pick us you’re a bad word.

    Goodie out

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