Welcome 239 to the first writeup of the season. Come join me and the boys at the first ever 239 freakoff!
Season 34 is among us… skates are sharpened, sticks are retaped, baby oil is well stocked, each team has hope for a chance at the belt. Opening night for my team begins with a matchup with my previous RW Champion duo last season in @RATERLE and his squad. (seen below)
Lets meet the teams shall we?
Up first the Rat Revolution
Rat Rehab
RW: The Captain as expected Kabz aka Rat
C: xJLucas (rookie debut)
LW: RockyDanglez
RD: BlueLineKing7 (will be called BLK from here on out on writeups)
G: St1dwalledGOAT
Now you know the rosters… lets talk about how we got here. Draft was recent, and the two capts had different strats. Mash swung and missed at landing Abutt he bid 68 on a player and DIDNT get him. GET PALED! Meanwhile Kabz spent heavy on a Dman in BLK making him the highest paid Dman (welcome back to 239 after a year off). Either way enough of the yip yapping… Lets get down to some hockey. GRAB THE BABY OIL ITS ABOUT TO GET FREAKY!!!
Oh we came… the boys went to work at the freak off. Nikdagreek started the game with a first period Natural Hatty, Abutt scored a 2nd period Natural Hatty, and Pale scored a 3rd period Natural Hatty. Abutt and Nik added another couple for good measure. Nik did NOT have the grudge match this time.
Final Score: RATS L 11-4
After game 1 Rat rallied the troops in the locker room to right the ship. Did it work?
Game 2
This game being the first home game for the Rats they are excited to hit the ice at the Sewer. This game was more of the same another Diddy pounding. It was 4-0 by the end of the first period, everybody on the ice got a goal except Kronos. Poor Kronos. Nik didn’t have the grudge match and got 4 points.
Final Score: RATS L 7-3
OUR FIRST 239 FREAK OFF RAID
Swat came in and scooped up all the baby oil from the stadium. They arrested Mr Anderson who was in the press box yelling at Thommy to make a fucking save. The boys at Rat Revolution were surprised by the raid and knew that this was becoming potentially the worst night in the Rat season so they did the honorable thing and lost game 3 on purpose to let them have something to be proud about. We did NOT want another FDM KILL situation on our hands.
Game 3
Who knows what happened. As Mash always says if there is no baby oil does it even matter? I know what happened. BLK got coned on repeat after we spotted the Rats a 4-1 lead in the first period. Abutt was left wide open back door for a last minute Game tying goal that is commonplace at Michaels Ranch.
Final Score: Rat L 5-4 OT
GGs to 239 Freak-offs I love you all, except for Ando that guy fucking sucks. Absolute dogshit player. Shake it off, it is only the third series of the season plenty of time to get back on the trot. Good luck the rest of the way.
3 Stars of the night
1) 69 Bods
2) Abutt
3) Mashotpa
239 I love yall Kabz has forced me to say this last line but remember everyone…
RATS ARE PEOPLE TOO