by: dvetts
It’s that time again, where I share my opinion for all to hate and disagree with. Let it be known i have done absolutely zero research on the rookies and players i don’t really know well, so as always this can be a bit off, it’s all in good fun. Before we get to the rankings, i have something to rant/complain about. HOW/WHY are the captains allowed to be like this? It’s even worse than last season as far as the bod values. You have 3 (I think) guys who are under 5 bod players and then for some reason you allow the 80 bod guy to also captain a team. Not only this, there is no balancing in bods before the draft, whether it be giving the lower tier guys extra or removing bods from the top guy or whatever. IMO this is absolutely unacceptable for parity and keeping things fair as a whole. Yes, I am well aware that it is basically impossible to get guys to be captains. But come on, this is ridiculous. Yall waited an eternity to announce the first batch of captains, everyone knows that drives sign ups. And if you have to wait an extra week to try to get guys in a more similar skill bracket to offer to do it, is that such a bad thing? I don’t get why it’s such a secret for so long and then you get cob and hawnky to captain next to abutt with no compensation LOL.
Rant over, onto the rankings in which I’ll do them in tiers rather than numerical because i think that will be a bit easier. I will also throw out what i assume is the projected lines and best&worst value picks
The Bad
Disturbing The Peace
Best Value: Jesushaxyou – 9 bods
Worst Value: Absolutely no star power
Jump – Ayytrain – Choco
GiJoe – Adam
Jesus
Extra: Sunz (Dman)
I don’t really know ayytrain well, but word is he is in that tier of lower bod captains along with cob and hawnky. This is not good, because he got absolutely nobody to help him score (unless jmap is a beast but at only 8 bods i’m not sure). Choco is a great glue guy to add to a team but he isn’t a driving force. Defense unit is meh, Jesus is gunna have to steal many games but I don’t see this team having any chance at making playoffs.
Corn on the Cob
Best Value: adrenaline – 1 bod
Worst Value: G Rawb for 16
sports – adrenaline – cob
Ian – King
Rawb
Extra; Mambo (dman)
I could have literally guessed this entire roster, except for the goalie, before the draft even started. Cob goes for friend team once again, but if it hasn’t worked the first 10x, I don’t know why it would now. Ian and king isn’t terrible on defense, but IMO Rawb is a very shaky goalie especially at that bod value. Getting adrenaline for 1 is actually pretty crazy, captains didn’t even care to bid up cob’s guys but he is a decent player. Again, no oomph to this team and shaky goaltending. I get wanting to play with your friends, but I don’t get how its fun never being in contention for winning a cup.
Netflix and Kill
Best Value: AJ
Worst Value: Bloody
Zigz – Aj – Rocky??
Kelch – Hawnky
Bloody
Extra: Katzz and danglesnipe
This team does not look good either. Zigz as a LW is fine, but he is best when he isn’t the best player on the team. AJ is a pretty good center but not an offensive juggernaut, and I guess Rocky is playing RW? Seems pretty ew to me. Then to make matters worse you have probably the worst dpair this season in how dare anybody try to break rules but me admin boy and hawnky. Hawnky’s biggest spend was on a goalie, that’s never a winning move, and I believe his stats were heavily skewed last season due to being on the team he was on, we will see what he is actually made of, because he’s going to be getting tested. A lot.
I don’t think it’s a coincidence that the lowest bod captains have the worst teams. They are already at an unfair advantage talent wise before the draft takes place. However, more often than not, they also usually draft the worst teams. I just don’t get it. Use your bods on good players lol
Rodents
Rat Business
Best Value: Hammer I guess
Worst Value: braindead drafting
Dainty – Hammer – Sniper
Rocko – Rat
Goat
Extra; Morpheus
Honestly they probably belong in the bad group, but at least hammer is a stud center and can probably carry some games. Usually he and rat can at least put goals on the board but rat was so braindead he double drafted at 2 positions and put himself mandatorily on RD. Rocko is a good piece but he’s playing on his off side this season for funsies and would rather be in net. Goat is a lower mid tier goalie. Looks as if he literally had no plan at all other than doing anything to get his buddy hammer. Sniper isn’t even on his better side because dainty is LW only.
Puck Hogs
Best Value: Deceptive/Jimmy
Worst Value: Lemanski
Lemanski – Frosty?/Pens? – Darz
Jimmy – Deceptive
Weazle
I love me some weazle, he’s been on my team a lot the past several seasons and he stuck his neck out to own. Consistently a top tier goalie and a sneaky decent skater, I had high hopes he would draft a good team. Sadly, probably not. Blowing his load at 58 for lemanksi as the first player nominated is silly. Lem is a good player but he’s not really near that type of value. After lem, his forward core is kind of a mess. A good value in Jimmy at 3, however he is going to have to actually play defense this season. I’ve heard good things about deceptive. I want to see weazle trade for a goalie and show the world his elite grinder center skills.
The MID
P Diddy Oilers
Best Value: turbo
Worst Value: Skull 16 bod PT G
Honestly I have no clue on the lineup
I like reep as a player, he is versatile and can play multiple positions at a good level of skill, which is an asset as a captain. I personally just don’t know many of the players on his team. Mackie went for 38, for whatever reason I don’t know who this is or what he plays. Nor do i know j whipz or lambo. Beliveau is always a pretty good part time piece. I think he could have spent more money on an elite forward or dman instead of drafting a 16 bod part time goalie when he got a great value in a 6 bod full time turbo, even if skull is a top tier stud goalie.
Rockers
Best Value: Blip
Worst Value: I guess a lot of bods into the part time G situation
Schemmm – frosty – blip
Trey – vio
cheevers/kronos/soldier
Schemmm comes back to captain after a pretty successful season, where the main issue was that blip was only part time. He got his boy, who exploded onto the scene last season, for a very modest 39 bods. I feel schemmm really enjoyed playing with him and easily would have went to 50, they really tore it up and i put them as front runners for most points this season, other than abutt. I think i’ve played with frosty before and he was decent. Trey is a good mid tier dman always, I have no clue who vio is but if he is good and can play defensive D, these guys have a very nice squad here.
The ELITE
The Blueprint
Best Value: Forward core
Worst Value: None
sejje – crazy legs – cee
rebel – kane/regretz
one of a kind
Extra: shotty
Here starts what i feel are easily the top 3 teams, what a coincidence that it’s probably the top 3 skill level captains (but can also argue schemmm is too). This is a balanced and dangerous team with a very good forward core that is supplemented with a fantastic RD that can also provide offense/step up when needed. Rebel as the worst player is pretty insane, he just needs to play good defense and let the other 4 guys cook.
Woooooo
Best Value: turtle and wizzy combined 21 bods
Worst Value: LW
Roman – nutz/fullsend – turtle/wizzy
matt/jc – suzuki
Weird
Extra: tommy
Ok seriously wtf captains, how do you let this team get turtle for 5 bods, and then wizzy for 16. Like this is possibly one of the best values in 239 history. Unfortunately nutz is only PT but he is also in the top elite talents of this league. A game 7 lineup just throwing nutz on LW is making this team look NASTY. Their hole is LW, but I have no doubt they will either get roman to just click up or find a suitable replacement that can. Matt and JC are 2 of the best dmen in the league right now and although suzuki has been a forward, surely he will have no problem adjusting especially with a defensive minded rw like wizzy helping. I always thought weird was a weak spot for these guys too, but after watching him more last season, he’s either gotten a lot better or has always been very solid. This core has either won the cup or made it deep every season they’ve been here, and no reason they won’t again with a very dangerous lineup.
Tarrific
Best Value: abutt free contract
Worst Value: none, odd i guess?
abutt – odd – owen
fung – coot
Drug
Extra: killershotz
Surprise surprise, the team with the 80 bod free contract is going to be gross. On paper some may see this as underwhelming or be like, “well he doesn’t have veds this season”. But abutt has never needed veds to put up disgusting numbers with bad players before. And his team isn’t even bad, it’s solid as hell. Owen as a 1 bod RW is amazing value, he’s much better than a 1 bod player. Odd on center is meh ok I guess, but literally just give it to abutt. Their d core is great. While 47 for coot is probably too much, 15 for fung is a bargain and 60ish for them together is a good value. Old man drug in net is obviously great too. I can’t stress enough how unfair I think it is for someone this good to be allowed a free contract.
The True #1
Hellions
Best Value: Pale is always number 1
Worst Value: lick my toes
floppy – pale – sauce
vetts/quong – papa/epik
Dom
We are the best, suck it.